Recently, I read that a boyfriend from many years past had died. The news did not change my life. The loss was a long time ago. Still today, I was sad, lonely and confused. For me, there would be no funeral, no condolences received, no grave visit, no eulogy. The past is never past. So now, how do I mourn? I decided to find a piece of a black ribbon — a kriah, the ribbon that is torn and worn by Jews as an expression of grief. I am not especially observant and I suspect that this may offend some, so I did not wear it, as a family member would, but held it in my hand as a symbol of a love lost.